Baby Talk

Two of my close friends were recently blessed with having a child (each, they are not married to each other. Ishh!). Congratulation, I feel happy for them. One had a boy and one had a girl. And they are living in the same area. Hmm, what are the chances for the two juniors to be an item in 15 years? That would be cool, I think. But 15 years is a long time. Plenty can happen so lets not talk about it just yet.
Lets talk about now.

Now, they are both incredibly happy. Now, they are an ‘abah’ (I think) & a ‘mummy’ (again, if I’m not mistaken). Now, they have their own family. Now, their life has that extra purpose and meaning. When we look at life being successful or the opposite, we first look to the family and no doubt right now they are on top of the world.

Now, lets look at me.

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As you can see, there is nothing.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m writing this not to complain about being single, alone or lonely. It’s just that I’m puzzled about how I feel on this baby business. When I heard the news about the babies, I was happy. I smiled, I laughed, but then immediately I thought of all the things they have to go through taking care of the juniors. And I said to myself, “Phew lucky me, I don’t have to go through all that.”

Is there something wrong with me?!

I’m 29, I should be having the desire to start a family, right? Why am I still thinking like I’m 21?

Ok, maybe I’m getting way ahead of myself here. Lets dump the baby talk. Lets talk about something more realistic. A girlfriend. Hmm, that’s not so far fetch does it? Well I once joked with a friend, asking him to find me a girl. I told him, “I want a girl that stays in Subang/PJ area, originated from KL/Selangor, an only child and has big eyes (the big eyes got nothing to do with the point I’m making, it’s just a personal preference. So take note all you big eyes girls!).

I may have been joking but I would like all of those things for real. Staying in Subang/PJ so I don’t have to trouble myself to see her. Originated from KL/Selangor so I don’t have to trouble myself with her family matters. An only child so I don’t have to trouble myself to be friends with her siblings. Do you see the pattern there? ‘So I don’t have to trouble myself.’ Sigh. That’s how my mind thinks. I want everything served to me on a silver platter.

When will I ever grow up, I’ll be 30 next year!

Someone told me I’m feeling all that because I haven’t found ‘The One’ yet. Once I have, my perspective will change. My priorities will change. So I have nothing to worry about. What I’m feeling now is normal.

Hmm, thank you for trying to make me feel better but I don’t think so. I know me. What I need right now is to grow up. No two ways about it!